About a month ago we reported that dad was in rehab after donating his second leg to science. Upon his arrival home, he seemed a bit restless about life. Considering he was in hospice and on his way out before removing the second leg, his anxiety was warranted. Initially the adjustments were difficult. Figuring out how to transfer from bed to a wheelchair to a toilet brought a whole handful of challenges. His body was weak from a year-long ordeal of surgeries, illness and grief. Consequently, dad was not excited about life.
Jeanine had resumed her role of full-time care taker, but with added difficulties. Dad’s frustration about his limitations was often directed to Jeanine. He needed more attention. He could not be alone for a long period of time and needed to be lifted off his wheelchair to the porcelain throne. As a result, Jeanine had to spend nights at his place, listening for his call to get help to the bathroom. Since dad’s apartment was a small bungalow made for a single elderly person, she pulled out a mattress to the living room at night and leaned it against the wall during the day. With only a few occasional nights off because of coverage from Mike or her brother, Ray, Jeanine was with dad 24 hours a day, physically and emotionally exhausted.
Recognizing his need for constant care and realizing the strain he was putting on us, dad agreed to move in with us. A little over a week ago we setup his bedroom in our living room. With a few minor adjustments, we have been able to accommodate all of his furniture and have a comfortable setup. Dad was a little nervous about the bathroom because it is not a handicap bathroom with support bars. With a little trial and error, and the help of his prosthetic leg, he is now transferring to from his wheelchair to the bowl with less effort than before. In fact, he is now doing it on his own and is enjoying the privacy.
At this point, dad is still unable to get his prosthetic leg on his stubbed knee so we continue to have a few overnight hollers for bathroom aid. At least we can hear them from the comfort of our own bed instead of a mattress on the floor in his apartment living room.
Dad’s attitude has changed quite a bit also. He is happy to be with us and is enjoying “family” life. Its amazing to see how fast he gone from ready to go home to Jesus to having fun watching New England Patriot Pre-Season football games. By the way, he always roots for the other team. He smiles often and likes to have discussions about everything and nothing. The other night, we were sitting down at dinner and Jeanine was talking enthusiastically about something (we all know she does that sometimes). She was carrying on and dad looked at her and pointed to her plate, indicating it was time to stop talking and start eating. I said to him that I have to do the same sometimes also. He responded, “You don’t have to tell me, I raised her!” I got an image of Jeanine as a child sitting at the dinner table talking excitedly about her day with dad patiently listening but pointing to her plate to get her to eat.
We are looking forward to the time we have with dad. There are ups and downs, but that is part of our role. We ask that you continue to pray for us, our 3-person family. We are looking for a new home so we can give dad his own bedroom instead of a living room to sleep in (and a home that is more heat efficient).
Thank you for your prayers on our behalf.
With love,
Mike and Jeanine
Dad trying out his newly donated motorized wheelchair
Watching pre-season football (please ignore the hideous wallpaper)
Oooooo, pretty
